Natalie had a question from a couple posts ago regarding why we don't medicate BoyTwo on the weekends. I really feel like this is a great question and one worth addressing as a post as it may be enlightening to others. It is actually something that I had thought about before the boys ever got home, and one that I thought deeply about once they arrived. What works for us won't work for everyone, but if it helps someone, then great!
The medication BoyTwo is on is not one that builds up in his system. He takes it, it works for 6-8 hours and then wears off. I guess you could liken it (lamely) to a tylenol. You take it, it offers its' relief and then it's out of your system. We also have him on the lowest dose we found that still helped him to concentrate/focus. There are no ill effects for him if he doesn't take it, as far as making him feel weird. It is more difficult for him to focus on something (unless it's talking about being in a gang or finding something to tap with or clap, lol) when he is not medicated. However, I chose to do it this for several reasons that I'm happy to share because I really feel like it might help others.
1) A lot of parents whose children are taking ADHD meds opt to not medicate over weekends and holidays, any non-school days. Some parents notice a big difference in their kids' personalities when medicated and will often refer to them as acting like little zombies while medicated. Parents can often tolerate and, dare I say, embrace their child's ADHD in a home setting, but their 'lively' way of life doesn't work for a school setting. This is very true for BoyTwo. He has a great sense of humor that is muted when he is medicated. We enjoy seeing his true self when he is home (this includes after school because the meds have worn off by then). He is still crazy hyper at home, but I am with him nearly every second and he does really well with me. I can provide consistency and structure for him at home that he (and I) can handle. I know him far better than anyone at the school and can see the little signals he gives off when he is about to rage or meltdown or when he is getting dysregulated and head it off. (This is also part of the reason that I am at the school SO much:)) At home we can prevent or avoid a lot of the problems he has at school. He poor or bad behavior is definitely affected by his ADHD, but has a lot more to do with his ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder) and suspected FAS that I am still trying to learn to help. I guess what I am saying there is that he still has behavior problems when he is taking his meds, so it's not like he's an angel at school all day and then if he doesn't have his meds he's some psychopath who is in trouble the whole day. Also, while we do continue to practice numbers and letters throughout the weekend, he doesn't have to be sitting down or quiet as in a classroom. If he is standing on his head mid breakdance move while we review, it's okay at home.
2) I touched on this briefly above, but ADHD meds sometimes have a 'zombie' like affect on kids. There are medications that build up a reserve in the system and then work off of that. ADHD meds (along with many others) have side affects. Some of the side affects include not being able to fall asleep. Another major side affect is that it affects the child's appetite. Because BoyTwo is already too small and needing to gain weight and grow, I did not want to add this to his list of 'issues'. I give him a pretty huge breakfast and dinner. He takes his meds as he is eating breakfast and they are worn off by the time we eat dinner that night at 7:30. His appetite for lunch is very diminished and he eats very little. On the weekends when he is off of his medication he eats a ton at all three meals and in between. I am glad that I don't have to worry about him eating enough. One less thing for us to battle.
3) This is a more practical reason. Our insurance coverage of his medication is not great. While I understand that there are many other medications out there that are far more costly, BoyTwo's medication is an expense. The medication we chose for him is a very basic one that many doctors suggest as a starting point when beginning to medicate. We also use the generic version of it and it still costs us $150 for thirty days. By only giving it to him on school days, the medication lasts an entire school week longer and therefore saves us a little money. While this is not a primary reason for not medicating him on weekends or holidays, it is, I guess, a bonus.
4) This is not yet an issue for us, but comes from knowing people with ADHD that were medicated as children. As adults they have shared with me that they felt zombie like and less than who they were while on the medication. Some have also been mad about having to take medication because they felt like people didn't like them for who they really are and felt like parents/teachers were trying to alter them. Because of how they perceived their experience with medications, they opt to not use medication as adults and struggle with their ADHD every single day. I guess I'm trying to help BoyTwo see that his medication can help him function better in his life (namely school and in the future, work) but that he can still have his personality. I want him to feel like his medication is helping him to function and not controlling or changing his personality. Please don't assume that every person who medicates or medicated their child for ADHD is doing psychological damage to them or that I think this is the case. Also, I am in no way judging any parent who medicated their child who is now an adult and is bitter about it.
This last paragraph is directly related to reason #4 and not at all to the original question. As parents we all do the very best we can for our kids and most of us don't make rash decisions. We study and ask questions and pray and ponder what is best for our child. Medications have come a long way in 20-30 years and hopefully will continue to progress. In the meantime, we are all doing the best that we can to provide our child with the ability to learn the skills he/she needs to become a functioning, happy, successful adult.
Thank you always, everyone, for your advice, encouragement, questions and general support. I need it!!
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