BoyTwo's Aspirations

I totally forgot to mention the highlight of the day! I stopped at the store to buy some chicken so that I could make dinner. My cards were declined. Come to find out, our accounts have been stolen yet again (this also happened nine months ago, two days before we were to leave the country for three weeks). Accounts are now frozen pending new cards and pins. Seriously.

As I was driving in the car today with BoyTwo as my only captive, I mean passenger, he was telling me all on his own about what he wants to do and be when he grows up. Now, honestly, I'm not sure why this is unsettling to me because it's pretty much spot on with what I anticipated. I also know that kids tend to have odd visions of their futures and that they usually/hopefully outgrow them.

Example 1: I have a girlfriend whose little boy told her one day that he wanted to grow up and be a bad guy. hahaha. This still makes me laugh. This boy is not a grown up yet, but is growing up into a very wonderful young man who is smart and talented and is most definitely not going to be a bad guy.

Example 2: A fellow adoptive mother has shared how her son hoped to be a taxi driver some day. This, too makes me laugh. I'm not sure of his hopes or dreams to date, but I'm pretty sure he's abandoned his desire to answer to 'Cabby!'

(Thanks in advance to Jodi and Wendy for letting me share their sons former dreams:))

And without further ado, our car conversation:

him: 'Mom, when BoyTwo big, me big (indicates growing taller with his hand) and me this (indicates big muscles with his hand).'

me, pretty absentmindedly: 'mmhhmm. You are going to be big someday and you are very strong.'

him: 'Mom, when BoyTwo big, me big I like girls.'

me suddenly more attentive, very grateful that we haven't had to deal with this yet in addition to everything else: 'yes, it's good to have lots of friends. Girls and boys.'

him: 'Me no I like boys. Me big I like girls. Me no kiss boys (me phew!) Me kiss girls.' giggle

me: 'You can kiss girls when you are 90.' knowing full well that the idea of not having a girlfriend until he is older is lost on him, at least right now.

him: 'Me I like tattoo. Me I like girl, I say hmmmm (acting like he is checkin' out a girl). Me tattoo (pointing to scrawny arm where bicep will someday be) here. Tattoo girl I like and heart and name.'

me: 'Maybe no girl tattoo. What if BoyTwo big, big likes a girl and then gets a tattoo. And tomorrow BoyTwo no I like girl. This is not good because tattoo is still there. Ought oh!'

this he actually understood and thought was funny. And by understood, I simply mean he understood what I was saying not that he understood and grasped the concept of the message. Not sure about that.

him: 'Me big I like tattoo girl. Girl big I like tattoos. BoyTwo tattoo and (again indicates growing taller and having big muscles) and me hit people and bleed and girls big I like BoyTwo.'

Yes, he thinks that if he gets a tattoo and beats people up girls will like him. Ukraine, you rock. (In all fairness this is not relative to all of Ukraine, just the part that he knows.) Not only does he think this, he wants this. Earlier today he was telling his brother that he didn't want to be smart and learn math because he would just steal things and hurt people. His brother was disgusted with this rationale and, in a lot of loud and fast Russian, let him know it.

me: 'BoyTwo, remember when you hit and kick and punch and choke _________? (insert name of boy whom he beat)'

nods head in the affirmative

me: 'remember (I name about ten girls that are in his class who is friends with) big, big, big cry and big, big, big scared of BoyTwo? Remember they do not want to play with BoyTwo? Remember girls big, big scared of you?'

him, sounding annoyed/disappointed/frustrated: 'yes'

me: 'Girls no like boys who hit and kick and punch and choke. Girls big I like boys who are nice and kind and smart and'

him, interrupting me: 'gentle'

me: 'yes! Good job! Girls like to feel safe and not scared. They like to have friends who are nice and kind and smart and gentle and no hurting people.'

him, in whiny voice: 'who is this smart. I no like this smart. Why girls big I like?'

Me, laughing to myself but not aloud: 'BoyTwo is smart. Girls like boys who think. They like to talk to boys about things that they know and they like boys who are smart. BoyTwo is smart.'

him: 'I no like this smart. BoyTwo big I like (again, the height, big muscles) and tattoos and hit people and bleed.'

On the bright side, I really think that I got him thinking when I was able to use a real life, recent example of girls not liking when he beat someone up. So, maybe there is a positive note in all of this. And yes, sometimes I start to talk like him when I talk to him.

p.s. BoyOne's ELL teacher got wind that he was learning the pledge and has decided that as part of their morning routine they will stand together and say the pledge of allegiance. I love it.