I've started this post five different times over the past week or so.
FIRST THINGS FIRST
New Year's was fun. This is the first year in twelve years that we haven't had a baby in the house which means we didn't need to be quiet! One was at a friend's house to ring in the new year, a first for her (not being with us for the celebration). We kept the other kids awake and entertained by playing games with them. Then, as the countdown began, I passed out pots and pans and when it was officially the new year, we cheered and made a lot of noise. The kids loved this and so did we. It was especially great because immediately after, they were all ready for bed, something that never happens around here.
With the New Year comes resolutions. I love setting goals and checking them off. It feels really good, especially because it seems that I am forever stuck on the same day that never seems to end (and I do mean that with all the love in my heart). Each year we (I) take individual time with the kids to help them set a few goals (six actually. in the following areas: home & family, spiritual, social & community, exercise & physical fitness, learning and education, and talents, interests & hobbies). While I most definitely suggest some, I let them come up with and decide on their own goals. (i.e. memorize the states and capitals in order of statehood vs. break the world record for the most back hand springs in a row; guess which was my idea)
Because I have about a million things that I need to improve on, I'll only share with you two that involve my interactions with my children and which I feel are the most important for me at this time.
1) tuck my kids in at night. I used to always be the one to tuck them in. Huz has taken that over the past two years for me, but I felt that I ought to take it up again as there aren't that many years left before I won't have anyone to tuck in anymore:(
2) 'That they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.' John 17:3 I want to make sure that my kids know that this is the most important thing I want them to learn. More important than doing their jobs, getting a good education, learning to be self-sufficient. I believe that if they can really know and understand and have a relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, the rest will happen, too.
SECOND
BoyTwo's 'new deal' didn't last very long. I would have liked to see it continue on, but he had some 'encouraging' and 'decided' that he was ready to do jobs again. He did make it to one church service in his pjs. I think he had originally thought that the other children from our congregation would think this hilarious, he didn't get from them the response he had hoped for and this had a lot to do with him changing his mind. He has since said to me several times over the past week, 'Mom, remember when I say I didn't want to do jobs and I stay in my pajamas in my room?' me, 'yep.' him, 'that was crazy.' like it was years ago instead of days ago.
THIRD
A year ago, because of health problems that all the females in our family were experiencing, we went dairy free (casein free) on the advice of our family doctor. It was life changing for us and, as a former, and honestly current, ice cream addict, I don't say this lightly. Interestingly, while it significantly improved our health, it also positively impacted BoyTwo's behavior. While only slightly, we will take any and all improvements that we can:)
Fast forward to now, a year later, we are still having some health problems, with Three being the most symptomatic. Soooo, I took her to our new (much more geographically close) doctor wondering if she was anemic or what. Doctor said, 'let's do a blood test and check for anemia and for some allergies.' Because I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, I said, 'oh. okay. We do have dogs and a cat.' Hello. She was talking food allergies. Anyhow. Last week when I got home from second grade one afternoon, there was a message on our machine from the doctor's office asking me to call back about the blood draw. I knew something had shown up because otherwise they would have said that everything looked fine, no need to call back. When I did get ahold of them, they told me that Three had tested positive for allergies to, drumroll please, wheat, eggs, and peanuts. Please remember that we are already dairy free.
WHAT IN HEAVEN'S NAME ARE WE SUPPOSED TO EAT?!
They also advised me to take her to an allergist who confirmed her allergies but added that they were not life-threatening but that we may not want to get any flu shots because they contain egg. Did you know that?! The allergist advised us to do a trial elimination diet which is what we did with dairy a year ago. I've decided that going dairy free a year ago was a huge blessing in disguise. We literally cried about having to give up dairy but have managed quite nicely. I have been able to recreate all of my recipes or find new ones that we like just as well. We are eating much more healthily and feel much better. Still, I was shocked to find out about these allergies. Shocked enough that I said to the doctor, 'But we have some sort of food with egg in it nearly every day!' to which she replied, 'that's probably why she is sick every day.' Oh, right. Duh. Anyhow. This past week while I've waited for our allergist appointment, I decided to not go crazy and throw away my food storage and drive 2 hours to the nearest health food/gluten free store to grocery shop. Instead, I've scoured the internet looking for recipes and reading, reading, reading. Pretty much it sucks. Or at least it sucks right now. I've decided that you really either need wheat or dairy in your life to make it even sort of easy to find something tasty to eat. This opinion is based on the experimenting I've done this past week and the epic fails that have taken place. We have had a couple (literally two) successes, so it's not all a loss. I am sort of hopeful that with the elimination diet we'll find that wheat isn't really that problematic or eggs (but I'm really hoping that wheat will work out for us). But, if it doesn't, we'll adjust because let me tell you: If we can go dairy free, we can do anything!! (except get BoyTwo to behave at school:))
In case you don't know what an elimination diet is, let me tell you. You very strictly eliminate one allergen from your diet for at least two weeks. With the dairy we did a solid month. Then, you reintroduce that allergen to your diet and see how your body reacts, or doesn't. If it does, then you know your culprit. If you don't react, you're safe to go back. With the dairy trial, we didn't eat anything with any sort of milk product in it. On day 32 we all ate ice cream and proceeded to get sick. This is how we knew it was dairy. Hopeful that it may have been lactose, we bought lactose pills and tried to eat ice cream again. No go. It's the casein.
FOURTH
Here's the biggest news for the day. BoyTwo was approved for special education services. It took having the district supervisor for our school district come to test him and then her supervisor to approve him, but in the end, he qualified. Everyone agreed that he needed it. He even had the scores to show that he did. The problem was that there was serious concern that 'someone' could claim these low scores were due to him not being completely proficient in the English language, so there were a lot of extra little hoops to jump through. I'm really excited for him. I'm really grateful to the school for pushing for it as much as they did and for advocating for him. I'm hoping that this will help him in a number of ways. I think that the smaller classroom setting will be hugely beneficial. At our school special ed is what we used to call resource. The kids are pulled out once or twice a day to a different classroom to receive much more help and in depth practice of basic concepts. There is also a 3 students:1 teacher ratio. He will continue to receive his ELL services, along with reading intervention and private lunches.
FIFTH
I have had some great talks with BoyOne recently. I would highly encourage anyone to figure out how to cut their children's hair. You wouldn't believe the talks we have while I'm cutting their hair. Maybe it's because they don't have to look directly at me or something. I don't know.
SIXTH
I haven't blogged about the boys' one year anniversary yet. I haven't been able to emotionally. There are way too many feelings that I can't deal with all at once. At least not yet. There is just too much loss associated with it. It may sound odd, I know. It was a great gain for us, personally, to finally have the boys with us and I am SO, SO grateful. Please, don't misunderstand that. There is just so much other loss. Recently, I read a post by a blog friend that adopted shortly after we did from the same region. She was commemorating their one year anniversary. There were pictures of places I had been, streets I had walked, etc. And oh my gosh. The thing that got to me the very most was her pictures of leaving the orphanage. Thinking of all those who are left behind. That's what keeps me up at night. Thinking about my kids and His.
