It's Been Awhile!

Wow! I can't believe that I've been home for almost 4 weeks. It feels like just yesterday. And my computer won't let me post any pictures. Sorry. Life is so busy, as you all know, getting ready for school and trying to cram as many summer activities in as humanly possible before the start of school. I hate when school starts. I always have. Summer flew by this year. It always does. We have a new principal (Hallelujah!!!) and I anticipate this school year will be better than last.

I don't even know where to start. That's the problem when you take a long break from any sort of journaling, when there is still a lot going on. My flights home were fine. I met some very nice people on each leg which made the time go by quickly. My last flight out of Chicago was cancelled. The plane was broken. At first I was annoyed, thinking to myself 'why me?' Then I realized that I was lucky that it was discovered the plane was broken BEFORE we got into the air. So the 'why me' quickly turned into a 'thanks for watching over me.' My flight was supposed to get in at 8:30 p.m. The airline was able to find another plane that could take the place of the broken plane but we had to wait for that plane to arrive, deplane and get ready. We finally boarded at 8:30 and I landed at 11:15. The girls were so happy to see me that they started crying. They were also very tired. We made it home at 1 a.m. The first week I was home I slept up in their room with them. While I will admit that after being away for that long it was hard to get used to their constant and loud chatter again, I was and am so very glad to be back with them.

So, for the adoption update. It may appear that not much has been going on, due to the lack of posting. That is not at all true. In fact, there has been so much going on that I can barely keep up with it myself, let alone record it all. In my mind I told myself to hold off because I know that things can change so quickly, and boy is that the understatement of the year!! If you had asked me a week ago when I thought we'd be bringing the boys home, I would have said that it probably wasn't going to happen. In fact, I told my mom not to buy their birthday presents as I was certain the adoption was going to fall through. Each day has been back and forth, up and down, all over the place. What's been going on? Well, I could tell you the whole long drawn out story, or I could summarize with just one word. Extortion. I'll give you the very brief story.

Two weeks ago we were anticipating hearing from the attorney as to who our assigned judge would be, and if said judge was good. Then we were prepared to wait another two weeks while we were assigned a court date, which should have put us at tomorrow, hearing when court had been scheduled. Instead, we received a call sixteen days ago telling us that court was going to be the next day and we needed to wire a large sum of money immediately. Well, because I wasn't born yesterday, and because I was smart enough to get a written agreement from the attorney before leaving (not that it amounts to much...), we quickly recognized that we were being scammed. Let me tell you how odd it is to be involved in something like this. It is so bizarre. And, at times, comical. Other times, infuriating. Okay, this is already longer than I intended. Back to the long story short version. We took a chance and told them, verbatim, that we were not willing to pay a ransom for our boys and that we were very annoyed that they were essentially being held hostage from us. We then offered an additional (much smaller) payment to help cover the 'unanticipated' costs of this 'difficult' case... blah blah blah. I seriously don't think I could make up the conversations we have had or the communications we have received in the past two weeks if I tried. My word.

Throughout the craziness of this all, one thing has remained-the feeling of peace. I truly thought that we would not be completing this adoption and although I was worried for the boys and sad for our loss, I had an overwhelming sense of peace that all would work out as the Lord had intended. We have always wanted what was best for BoyOne and BoyTwo, for His will to be done, even if that meant that we were not supposed to adopt the boys. We were willing to do whatever was best for them and to help to improve their quality of life, so I figured things were headed in that direction. But, as things so often do in the world of adoption (and the world in general), things changed quickly. We are now in the ten day wait for the birth certificate to be annulled. The biological parents of the boys have been and still are in favor of the adoption. The boys are still asking when we are coming back to take them home. As of earlier today, there have been no additional demands for money and no 'appeals' to the courts ruling. Knock on wood. I say 'as of earlier today' because who knows what will go on during their Friday, which is just beginning.

I miss Ukraine. I miss BoyOne and BoyTwo. I still have trouble sleeping at night (as I always have) and more often than not, my thoughts turn to those people I came to know and love during my time in Ukraine. Why them? Why not me? I think about how the only difference between us all is our opportunity. Opportunity economically, socially, educationally, spiritually. I truly believe that the knowledge of a Supreme Being, of a God that is literally a Father in Heaven, can change the world. I know that His son, Jesus Christ, did change the world. I've never been one to wonder on that. I guess I'm blessed with easy faith in those two things. There are things that I wonder about or questions that arise, but I have never doubted the surety of those two beings. To know that in my own little mind is one thing. To literally see it, or the lack of it, is another. There are times during the day, however, that I wish for the simplicity of their country. Although they deal with poverty and corruption on a much larger scale than we ever will, we deal with having so much that it becomes easy to get lost in the day to day. I still get sick to my stomach thinking about those beautiful, wonderful children of God who live in orphanages throughout this world. I wonder what is happening this very minute to the ones we met during our first trip there who have 'graduated' and are now on their own. I wanted to try to help some of them when we went back. Nobody knows where they are or where they went. They sort of just disappear.

While I was in Ukraine I asked Yana, my amazing translator, several times, how she could continue her line of work. She is a translator mostly for people who are coming to adopt. She also volunteers at and has worked in orphanages. Natasha, our equally amazing translator in Kyiv, does the same. I asked them both how they could bear to go back, time and again, to see these children in these circumstances and how it did not overwhelm them. Yana shared with me that she felt like this in the beginning, but then she realized she had to get over herself and her emotions and continue to go back for the sake of the children. At the beach one day, two boys came up to her. She knew them from the orphanages. She had taught them. She had taught their siblings. She had seen them grow up there and now they were on their own. She knows so many children. The children at the orphanage recognize her and love her. She said to me that she didn't think she could ever be a mother because she wasn't a strong enough person. But I know she IS strong enough. She is a mother to all of these children. Thank heavens for these women and others like them.