USCIS, part 1

So, here goes adoption information. Some people, whose blogs I have stalked, have heavily documented their adoption process which I have found extremely helpful. Thanks, all you people that I don't know and the few of you that I do:) I find that for me, personally, the more information I have, the better. Some people do better when they know less about potential happenings, but I tend to want to find out as much as I can. So, I am going to document things as we go through this paperwork chase of the adoption process. If it ends up being helpful to someone great. If anything it may prove to be educational as to the process of international adoption. Or it may just be a lot of words that people don't want to read:)

First things first. A home study needs to be done. Our agency that we are using has a social worker that is licensed through them to do international home studies. Not just any licensed social worker can do a home study if you are applying for foreign adoption, they have a special designation for international work. Their social worker has already met with us and we had already completed some of the paperwork that was needed from when we hosted the boys back in October. I have to say that this particular lady is pretty awesome. If she lived closer, I think we'd be hanging out. We're eerily similar. Our husbands share the same name, and one of our kids do too. We almost had two kids with the same name but they ended up naming their daughter after a grandmother. Our favorite colors are the same, hobbies, quirks, we even have some of the same furniture in our houses arranged in the same way in the same bedroom. Wild, I know.

So, the home study needs to be done and sent in either with or right behind a lovely form called the I-600a. It's a petition to adopt a child. Basically, if I understand this right, we are submitting an application to our government to be allowed to adopt. The have to see our birth certificates to make sure we are really alive, our marriage certificate to be sure we are really married, and our home study to be sure we have been investigated and found able/capable of adopting. The cost is almost $1000. The nice thing about this process is that while it is costly, the amounts to be paid are spread out over a few months.

This little form took all of ten minutes to fill out and sign. The forms that went with it were easy too, with the exception of the home study which was more time consuming. But, remember we had already done most of it before we hosted. Over all, this was not bad.

HOWEVER...

...there is always a catch, right? Because I am a blog stalker I have seen many many cases where this form has been a major hold up. They will send it back for really little things like leaving a line blank instead of putting "unknown" or "n/a." A few lucky people have had it back in a couple weeks time, others have waited 6 weeks. Besides being an inconvenience as far as the waiting game goes, it can cause problems when you're up against a time frame. For example, trying to complete an adoption before the Ukrainian government meets again to vote for a moratorium. We will be assigned a case worker as soon as our documents are received by the USCIS and then we just wait for that approval. There have been a few families who, because of case workers lack of empathy and emotion and incentive, missed a deadline by literally HOURS. These case workers have even been fully aware of said deadlines and showed serious lack of compassion, which is irritating. So, we are hoping to have a nice case worker, who doesn't mind doing their job. If all else fails, I've heard that placing a call to Senator Hatch can be quite effective:) We're lucky here in Utah to have elected officials that care enough to become involved in matters such as these. There are many other states where the elected officials will not do anything for anyone that does not involve them benefiting monetarily. So, I'm just planning on there being a part two to the USCIS part of the process (or even a part 2, 3, and hopefully not 4). This way, I won't be disappointed if/when it happens and then if it is smooth sailing, I'll be pleasantly surprised.

While we wait for our government approval, we will be preparing a document to be submitted to the Ukrainian government (SDA) called a dossier. It's like an international home study. All of the documents have to be apostilled which is a fancy word for paying a lot of money to have a piece of paper notarized at the state capitol. A lot of these docs have to be notarized and then apostilled. Hopefully we can get that all put together pretty quickly. We'll see.

In the meantime, life goes on and some of our friends are in Ukraine right this very second trying to adopt the kids they hosted this fall. It's exciting to read about their experiences. I think it will be great fun to go to this country. I'm trying to find out some information about it that will make it a meaningful trip. There is so much history there and so many things left over from their communist era. We will have to go for three weeks. At the end of that three weeks is a ten day waiting period. Lots of people stay during that ten day wait and hang out at the orphanage with the children. I would LOVE to do that. But, I'm just guessing that we'll end up coming home in between. It'll be hard to leave our kids for that long and hard to find someone who is able to take care of them for that long. At the end of the ten day wait, at least one parent has to travel back to Ukraine to get the kids. This trip can take anywhere from a few days to another week. That's all for now!

p.s. I bought BoyTwo some pjs the other day. Huz made fun of me when I showed him them. They were Christmas pajamas and I hadn't even noticed. Oh well:)

Reflecting

Lots of things have been making me reflect lately. In particular, I have thought a lot about how the Lord answers prayers. Prayers where we ask for direction and guidance, prayers for peace, prayers for health, all kind of prayers. It has been interesting to me to see how my life has unfolded since moving up here. It was never in my plans to home school, yet it has been a real blessing. Too funny that it was such an enormous headache to get to that point.

I have started watching a neighbor's kids for her while she is at work. One of the kids is an 8 month old baby girl. She is stinkin' cute. Really. I don't usually think that babies are cute, but let me tell you, this one is a doll. Having had my kids fairly close together, mainly the last three, I didn't realize that this meant they don't really have any memories of babies being at our house. (because they were all too young to remember) Which is quite ironic, being that it seems to be my only memory. haha. With One being at home during the mornings and finishing up school work fairly quickly, she has had time to interact with this baby and with Four. She and Four have built a sweet little relationship, one that without One being home schooled may not have happened yet. Both of them look forward to "recess" time (when school work is finished) so that they can play together.

The other day, One picked up the baby we watch, hereto known as GG, who had happened to just have a blow out diaper. I can't tell you how many of these diapers I have changed over the years. The number is endless. Somehow though, One has no recollection of such an event. It was hilarious to watch her face go from laughing at the giant toot to a creased eye brow as the smell started to increase. The creased brow quickly turned to panic as the poop began to leak all over the two of them.

"What do I do?!" she cried out to me, holding GG as far away from her as possible.

And this is only one of many experiences she is getting to have. And I am very glad. Very thankful. I'm not going to be having any more babies (WooHoo!!!) but I don't want any of my kids growing up not knowing what to do with one.

I heard something this past weekend, a reminder to have faith not only in the Lord, but also in His timing. This is something that I will probably have to remind myself of for a really long time, patience not being one of my better qualities. Another thing that I heard was that when God gives you something to do, it's not your battle, but His and He will make sure that it gets done. Sometimes we feel like we cannot do what is expected of us or what we feel we should do, but thankfully, it's not up to us to make it happen, God will provide the way-we just have to be willing. This doesn't mean that we don't have to try, or that it won't be hard, just that we don't have to figure out every little detail, that we don't have to know exactly how something is going to play out, that God will get it done.

My mom and dad live in beautiful Tennessee. Seriously, love that place!! There are churches everywhere. Everywhere!! And they all have billboards or marquis with words of inspiration on them-it's nice. Recently my mom saw one that she shared with me. I have tried to remind myself of it on days when life seemed a little too "not how I had planned." It reminds me just who is in charge and that it's all good. The sign said,

"The task ahead of you is never as great as the power behind you."

second time today

Just read a quote from Gandhi that I have a love/hate relationship with, but I wanted to share.

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win."

Love it, because it is so true. Hate it because it is so true.

I wonder how many snow days Gandhi took and how many pans of brownies he consumed before he overcame his natural man. hmmm...

hooky

Today we're having a self-declared snow day.

Last night it snowed a whopping 1 inch and due to the fact that Three only has school 1/2 day anyway, One same thing, and Two cries every day there is school, I decided that our time would be better spent at home.

So far, the girls have all had a long bath and are currently eating brownies. What more does a girl need?!

"sigh"

Today was long. It feels like it should be midnight, but it's only 8:30 p.m.-and I'm a night person! I just pulled some ice cream out of the freezer and it's sitting on the counter, thawing just enough for me to scoop.

The house work part of having kids is driving me nuts right now. My house usually looks like a war zone, toys and kids everywhere. Today was no different. As long as everything underneath is clean, I usually don't care so much about the toys. The kids love to set up American Girl doll cities on the stairs, Polly Worlds on the pool table, frame the entry rug (carpet remnant is more appropriate a term) with jigsaw puzzles (at least they're put together).

Sometimes, okay, a lot of times, they like to leave this stuff out, which I get. I remember being a kid (vaguely) and working so hard to "build" your play stage, only to have to take it down and start all over tomorrow. So, I usually let them leave their cities and worlds out (the puzzles have to go back in the boxes each day. This way they at least have to put them together again tomorrow and it keeps them busy for 7 minutes). As long as I can pick it up and vacuum underneath, it's okay.

Except every once in awhile I wonder why I don't keep my house looking like nobody lives in it! How do people do this?! I'm sure they don't allow Pet Shop worlds all over the fire place or Noah's Ark to take place in the front room, but still. It's so discouraging. Now, before you tell me to have the kids pick up their toys and help with all of this, I do. I'm actually kind of mean in that department. My motto is if the kids are capable, then it is their job. I just get tired of supervising it and listening to the moaning and groaning. And, I have taken and thrown away the toys before, so they know that I mean business. I really am just complaining tonight. I know how to get it done, I just don't want to.

Like tonight, I had a houseful of kids all day. It was fun, really. They all played happily and messily:) and I cleaned the kitchen. Then, I made dinner, we ate dinner and now the dang kitchen needs cleaning again! And that is the straw the broke the camel's back. Or in my case, the mess that brought out the ice cream and landed me in front of the computer. By the end of the day I don't want to pick up any more or do any more dishes or laundry or clean bathrooms or any of that stuff that somehow all needs to be done again for the fifth time. Groan. I just want to sit in front of the fire place and knit with the house magically picked up while somebody spoon feeds me ice cream!!

Where is my magic wand?!

a few announcements

I am an Aunt!!

My sister had her first baby this morning-two weeks early, lucky girl!!! We can't wait to go see that sweet little baby! Especially Three. She sure does love those babies!!! For those who know my sisters, it is the sister with the silver hair. Exciting, I know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This morning at 8:30 when we drove the girlies to school it was a whopping -11. Brrrr. Fortunately, though, things warmed up a bit and the high today was 9. But I'm not even going to complain because up here in the good old mountain air I can see the beautiful blue sky!! And that, my friends, is my tender mercy.

I keep forgetting to report back on the "glove drive" that I did for the orphanage. The glove collecting was amazing, thank you all you awesome friends! I have the best friends and family that support all that I do! A few other people that I don't even know heard about this project and a lady in Colorado collected a bunch of stuff with her church and drove the stuff to Utah to be sent to Ukraine! Can you believe it?! People never cease to amaze me! I often feel hopeless that the number of proactive, caring people is so small that a difference cannot be made. Then, every time, I am privileged to witness an act of generosity and kindness, of true charity, which I believe is the pure love of Christ. And each time, my faith in humanity, my hope for good to prevail, is strengthened along with my desire to do better and to be better. This charity I believe in is not simply something that you do, but something that you are. Something that will guide and direct your life. I hope to be able to get some pictures of the kids who are receiving the gloves and other gifts within the month that I will post. Just so you can see their sweet faces and know that they are real.:)

...and I hesitate to mention this last thing because it seems like everything is always so up and down and back and forth that it makes me nervous to say it out loud. But I guess technically I'm typing so maybe it won't really count...

I am going to be practicing my Russian on Ukrainian soil, hopefully at the end of March, when we go to pick up BoyOne and BoyTwo and bring them back to the U.S. as Holbrook's. WOOOOOO-HOOOOOOO!

Prayers to those headed to Ukraine this week for their adoptions and prayers continuing for the moratorium to not pass!

just a thought

So, at church on Sunday, one of the speakers was talking about faith. It wasn't anything we haven't all heard before. It's just that it's always good to hear it again.

He spoke of the story of Moses leading the children of Israel out of Egypt and how they got to the Red Sea and were in need of a serious miracle to get away from Pharaoh's armies. Some of the children of Israel began to complain. I really can't blame them. They began to doubt that they had been led here by God. They were forgetting the miracles that had previously taken place. Because they were again met with opposition, they doubted their journey.

And then...

the waters parted.

(Insert singing of heavenly choruses)

Oh phew! Except the waters stayed parted and the Egyptians started to follow them. I'm pretty sure I would've been saying, "Seriously?" (That 's one of my favorite things to say.) Followed by an eye roll.

So, even though they'd had oodles of miracles, they knew they were doing the right thing, they had seen the hand of the Lord in their daily lives, they panicked, then the sea parted and they crossed a SEA on DRY LAND!!! Only to look back to see the crazy Egyptians hot on their tails. If they were panicked before, I'm pretty sure they were again. Here they are walking across an ocean ON DRY LAND and they were still being pursued!

And then...

God returned the waters to their normal state, and in Exodus 14:28 we read that the waters "covered the chariots, and the horsemen, and all the host of Pharaoh that came into the sea after them; there remained not so much as one of them." I really love the dry humor of the Bible. In verse 30 it says "Thus the Lord saved Israel that day..." hahaha. I love it. All in a days work:)

Anyhow, the point that I took with me on Sunday, one that I am reminded of often, is that even though we may be doing the right thing, it doesn't necessarily mean it's all going to be easy peasy lemon squeezy. In fact, a good way to tell that you are doing what's right is if suddenly the Egyptian army is after you and you're stuck between them, huge sand dunes and a big ol' sea. Just take a deep breath and start walking into the water.

Have faith and the sea will part...